Monday, November 7, 2011

Herman Cain's campaign just dropped dead amidst shocking allegations of sexual harassment - "You want a job, right?"

By Patrick



Is it a comedy or a tragedy? A tragicomedy? The Republican primaries have descended into the weirdest political joke I have ever seen. It is bad enough that a woman like Michelle Bachmann, whose mental health is in great doubt (proof here and here and at many other places), is still part of this circus and bad enough that Rick "I definitely wasn't drunk" Perry still wants to be taken seriously (and don't ask me whether Rick Perry is gay or not, I read the whole weekend lots of articles and watched lots of videos regarding this question, and my head still hurts).

But now, things have come to an "all time low." Unfortunately, there also is Herman Cain.

What excitement at first! Look at the following scene from the hilarious, underrated comedy "Undercover Brother" (2002) with Dave Chappelle and you get a taste.

Watch:



I had to think about this movie today, because what follows in "Undercover Brother" is the announcement by the "black Powell-like candidate" that he will NOT seek the Presidency and that he will open a chain of fried chicken restaurants instead. Why does he do that? Because in the movie, he was artificially "brainwashed" by the "enemies of the blacks" who wanted to prevent a black candidate from running...

The brainwashed "black candidate" then even makes a commercial for his new fried chicken chain:



Now that's just a funny little movie. In reality we have a different situation: We have a former black pizza mogul who somehow bears a frightening resemblance with the "black candidate" in "Undercover Brother", and who DOES seek the presidency. The reality is as surreal as the movie, although Herman Cain is probably not "brainwashed." He appears rather to be "braindead." And the story in the movie and the reality these days frankly seem to be equally surreal. Also, it's just fair to point to the fact that Herman Cain is black, although it should really be of no importance whatsoever, because Cain himself has no hesitation to play the race card. Something which President Obama never did, as far as I know.

The existence of "the candidate Herman Cain" really started to freak me out this weekend - you can only take surrealism to a certain extent, because it quickly can turn into madness.

Fortunately, Herman Cain is already finished. The "4th accuser", a woman called Sharon Bailek, today went public with a dramatic statement in a press conference with a serious and detailed charge of sexual harrassment, with Gloria Allred representing her.

Watch:



AP reports:
A fourth woman has accused Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain of sexual harassment--this time in public. Sharon Bialek told reporters in a press conference Monday that Cain groped her and exhibited "sexually inappropriate" behavior toward her when he was head of the National Restaurant Association.

Bialek, a former NRA employee who worked for the association in between 1996 and 1997, said the encounter occurred shortly after she was laid off from the group's education fund in July 1997.

She said she had approached Cain for help in looking for a new job and had traveled to Washington, D.C., where she had dinner with the then-NRA head. She told reporters that upon her arrival in D.C. she discovered that Cain had secretly upgraded her hotel room to a suite.

After dinner, the two were sitting in his car when she claimed he "suddenly reached over and put his hand on my leg under my skirt and reached for my genitals" and moved her head toward his crotch.

"I was surprised and shocked, and I said, what are you doing? You know I have a boyfriend," Bialek recalled saying. "This is not what I came here for."

Bialak claimed that when she protested, Cain replied, "You want a job, right?

The "Cain Staff" even had the audacity to mock Gloria Allred on twitter before the press conference:


Well, I guess now they won't laugh any more.

As sad as that all is, we should have a last laugh at Herman Cain's expense. I still somehow cannot believe that this man really exists. Get me out of the matrix! ;-)

Just about two weeks ago Herman Cain released the weirdest, and again, most surreal advert by a presidential candidate I am aware of. If you haven't seen it yet, you have to.




This advert has already sparked a wave of spoof adverts. Let me present to you some of the best I found.

UNEMPLOYED:



JON HUNTSMAN'S DAUGHTERS (more details regarding this ad HERE):



DAVE LETTERMAN:



SPECIAL MENTION - BEST SMILE AT THE END:



Herman Cain is the 0-0-0 candidate.

But who is giving me my sanity back?

Has the USA truly been Palinized, or is there still hope? Is this a silly question to ask? Is this all just a dream? ;-)

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